The end that is supposed to be a beginning

One of the last things that we were told in America was: „This is actually not the end, it’s a beginning.“ Well, I can’t say I completely agree. I mean, of course we still have our projects and reunions and all kinds of interesting  BFTF-related things, but the institute as it was for 4 amazing weeks, is over. Over and finished.

I have been home for 3 weeks now and life is pretty much back to how it used to be before BFTF. After coming back I had a whole week of catching up with sleep and then I went to work for two weeks  in a row, so I had to concentrate on other things. I guess that helped a lot with the homesickness I felt towards the BFTF. So now it is finally time to pull myself together and write a short summary, mainly for myself.

These four weeks were definitely the most interesting, breathtaking, amazing, beautiful and, to be completely truthful, sometimes hard weeks of my life. I had so many new experiences, both small and big. 

I learned a lot about America. Before I started my trip, I still had the „American Dream“, but I was also totally sure that in reality, that kind of thing does not exist. But in USA, to my great surprise, I found out that there is an American Dream – it is the diversity, the fact that different places in America are so different that everybody finds their own special place, place where they fit in. I went to 9 states (Indiana, Illinois, Ohio, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, Maryland, Delaware, District of Columbia, Virginia), although I only drove through most of them. So I only spent some time in Indiana, Chicago, Philadelphia and Washington D.C.

My absolute favorite was D.C. This city has so much space. It has many European-and-old-looking houses and kind of an old charm, but at the same time it is very lively and modern. People in suits and ties are cycling around the city, wearing backpacks and you can see people running everywhere. The city is pretty big, but it has many green areas and it very very clean.

I also learned that political opinion in USA is very important – whether you are a Democrat or a Republican. Indiana, the state I spent the most time in, is mostly Republican. As a European, it was sometimes a bit hard to understand their principals. People in Indiana are also very conservative, at least from my liberal European viewpoint. Maybe the conservatism has something to do with the fact that people there are mostly very religious. Young couples should not move in together before they are married (imagine how many couples in Estonia never get married and just live together and raise a family). If you are from Estonia, the world’s least religious country, it is impossible to imagine how big impact do their beliefs have on the people. But I guess until it helps people keep away from all kinds of bad things like alcoholism or crime and makes them better people, religion is a good thing.

Americans are very open and outgoing. The first couple of times we went shopping it actually freaked me out a little when everybody was always saying „Hi, how are you doing“ and asking if I needed any help, if I was looking for something specific or just trying to somehow keep up the conversation. At first I felt like I was constantly being pressured into buying more stuff, but as I got used to it, it started to feel normal, maybe even too normal because after I had come home, I felt like everybody in the stores was being exceptionally rude. 

Yesterday was Estonia’s 20th Reindependence Day (if there is such a thing like Reindependence Day in English language, but I hope you get the point). Then I started wondering what is the common thing that makes the nation patriotic? In Estonia, I guess, it is the feeling of one nation, our history and our songs (well, you know, the Singing Revolution and so on..). But what makes Americans patriotic, what ties them together? They are from very different ethnical backgrounds and cultures. Well, I think that there are two things – religion and the American Dream. Even though there are so many different religious beliefs represented in America, the country’s motto – In God we trust – says it all. And the American Dream, the melting pot, I’m sorry, a salad bowl (because it is not advisable anymore to say melting pot), the idea of freedom and equality.

I learned a lot about US political system, law system, different European cultures and so many other things, but I learned the most about myself. I learned that I am very liberal, open-minded about most things, but I can take comments about my country very personally and, even though I am usually the least patriotic person you can imagine, I got really really patriotic in USA. 

Every time I told somebody about where I was from, I said that Estonia is in Northern Europe just below Finland. I never mentioned anything Eastern just because then people think that we speak Russian. Do not get me wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong about speaking Russian, but we have our special, beautiful and rather unique language. But one little girl came to ask me about my home country and the conversation was something like that:

Girl: „Hey, I heard you are from Russia.“

Me: „Where did you hear that from?“

Girl: „My parents told me.“

Now I want to point out that I had talked to the girl’s parents before and I gave my usual Northern-European-country speech. So I was very surprised, how they somehow could still relate Estonia to Russia. Well, then I explained to the girl how I live in Estonia and speak Estonian, which is totally different from Russian. I don’t think it made a difference, but at least I tried.

Well, I am definitely not done yet, I will write a couple of more thoughts on America, BFTF and everything else in general.